Clergy from left, The Rev. Mary Ann Hill, Pastor Nicolé Ferry, Deacon Cynthia Biddlecomb, retired, Associate Priest Lynn Finnegan and Pastor Deb Church. Photo by Nate Limback/ladailypost.com
By Pastor Lynn Finnagan
Associate Priest
The Episcopal Church of the Holy Faith
Santa Fe
“The news is so terrible these days. I think I need a Rule of Life. Can you help me?” I received this telephone message recently. When we spoke later, my friend shared her concern about the agitation the daily news was causing her. She had read about having a personal Rule of Life and wanted to know more. My friend was on to something. Formulating a personal Rule of Life can provide peace, strength, and purpose in this often news-weary and divisive world. It can help break destructive patterns in our lives that simply aren’t life-giving. A Rule of Life can dissolve both despair and apathy.
What is a Rule of Life? Rules of Life developed in Christian monastic communities in the sixth century. The Rule provided accountability and a framework for living a spiritual life both alone and together. I know what you are thinking: 1. I don’t live in a monastic community and 2. I don’t like rules. A Rule of Life is not limited to communities, though.
Let me explain by first saying what a Rule of Life is not. It is not a “to do” list. It is not New Year’s resolutions. It is not even a “rule,” in the rigid, you-must-follow-or-else sense of the word. “Rule” comes from the Latin, “regula,” meaning “rhythm,” or “regularity of pattern.” A Rule of Life is a rhythm: a strong, regular, repeated pattern that reflects a love of God. Through a Rule, you partner with God’s transforming work in your life. A rule of life gives priorities and direction.
Search “Rule of Life” on the internet and resources are overwhelming. This is a great way to avoid writing a Rule of Life: keep reading everything written on the subject! I suggest you read a bit, reflect a bit, pray a bit, and then just write something. Without a writing you can refer to, a Rule of Life is simply another aspiration. To be life-giving, a Rule must also be realistic. If you have three kids and a full-time job, a Rule of Life might be five minutes of prayer in the morning and five in the evening. Whatever you create, your Rule is not an ideal toward which you are striving to soar. Think of it more like a trellis upon which you are growing: growing stronger in your relationship with God.
A Rule of Life is personal to you. Many good examples can be found, but they are examples. Your Rule reflects YOU, and you can change it when needed. Once you have your Rule in place, and you feel comfortable, share it with someone who can give you spiritual guidance. Any one of the woman pastors with this article would love to help.
For a personal Rule, I particularly like resources from The Society of Saint John the Evangelist, https://www.ssje.org/category/growrule/ or https://www.ssje.org/framework-for-freedom/. They also have a free workbook you can download. Formulating a Rule of Life does take time, but, as the saying goes, you’re worth it. So is your relationship with God.
Editor’s note: ‘All Shall Be Well’ is a column written by local women clergy including ELCA Deacon Cynthia Biddlecomb, M.Div., retired (czoebidd@gmail.com); Pastor Nicolé Ferry, Bethlehem Evangelical Lutheran Church (pastornicole@bethluth.com); Associate Priest Lynn Finnegan, The Episcopal Church of the Holy Faith, Santa Fe (rev.lynn@holyfaithchurchsf.org); Pastor Deb Church, White Rock Presbyterian Church (pastor@wrpchurch.com) and The Rev. Mary Ann Hill, Rector, Trinity on the Hill Episcopal Church (momaryannhill@gmail.com).
